Environment : I'm sitting in the dark, lava lamp on, listening to FKA twigs, thinking about how I'm going to start “this” my first post, for the multitudes of people who may have been just curious enough to know what this “FML" thing is. Its a couple minutes past twelve, I'm tired, I mean, I really shouldn't be doing this now but I am. It could wait till the morning or the next day but right now, I have this burning urge to write. I just don't know what it is I want to write.

Vague, I know, but, in the sea of all this vagueness, my roommate walks into my room and disturbs all of what's perfectly balanced in my natural environment.

“Mzwa, how do you get laid here?”

Totally unexpected, I know, he got me too, but just so that we don't digress, I want you to understand fully, that at this point I knew what direction to take to introduce myself to you my virtual audience.

I am Mzwa. I don't want this to sound too much like a “dear diary” piece but I need you to acknowledge that I am Mzwa. I'm never at a loss for words, for thought or creativity. You don't have to acknowledge that just yet, but, my name is a totally different case.

Maybe I sound a little cocky, perhaps I sound proud. I don't mind you thinking either of the two. I hope the latter makes you love me and the former, envy me. I really do. I'm so proud of the fact that my name is Mzwa and I'm cocky enough too to tell you that. Why shouldn't I be?

Aren't you? Are you so ashamed of who you are that you won't make it essential that the first thing people acknowledge about you, is your name? The very first gift you were given in this world after that of life, your name? And you aren't going to have the world acknowledge it? I am Mzwa.

The mother of all clichés: “I'm not perfect.” Fuck that. I am. Don't get too lost in the surface of things, pay closer attention. I am perfect. Not “what” I am, but “who” I am. My name is who I am and it's so perfect, so perfect in fact that I'd like you to acknowledge it just one more time.

I am Mzwa.

Perfect. My self-esteem is on fleek right now. I'm listening to some intensely amazing music, in the dark with nothing but the illumination of my lava lamp. I'm never at a loss for words, thought or of creativity. I am Mzwa, and round about now, I've got you to acknowledge it. I should have. If I've done what I intended to do from the beginning then after this, then perhaps I've got you thinking that you are perfect. Who you are, not WHAT you are. WHO.

Be proud and cocky about it, then perhaps, how to get laid won't be as much an issue as you make it.

:)

I Am Mzwa